The Screen Actors Guild threatens “surprise” for Jim Pasco

Jim Pasco, director of the Fraternal Order of Police, said today that he has a “surprise” in store for movie director Quentin Tarantino, who is under scrutiny for making anti police brutality comments. When asked to specify what surprise he had in store, he would not elaborate but said “it may or may not be (a surprise that affects him) economically”.

Not to be outdone in sheer self-involved ridiculousness, the Screen Actors Guild, representing Hollywood’s leading actors and actresses, released a statement saying that they have a surprise for Jim Pasco and the FOP.

Bill Smith, spokesman for the SAG, said:

“It is a sad day when anti police brutality comments can be extrapolated into all-around hatred of police officers. To make an analogy, this would be like if a cop stated that he hated all John Travolta movies just because he starred in Battlefield Earth! That’s just insanity! Although Wild Hogs was awful too.”

“Needless to say, we have a surprise lined up for the Fraternal Order of Police and Mr. Pasco. The surprise may or may not be a direct to video release of Keystone Kops: The New Millennium starring Corey Feldman and Larry The Cable Guy. Then again, it may or may not mean that movie stars will stop calling for the police every time we overdose, or have domestic disputes inside our soulless mansions. As soon as I figure out which of these options is more economically viable, I will let you know.”

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