Rick Snyder attempts to outsource Flint River to China


Rick Snyder, Michigan’s most infamous nerd governor, hasn’t had much relentless positivity lately. The Flint water debacle has blown up in his face, to the tune of President Obama earmarking $80 million to clean up the “federal emergency”. In a half-hearted attempt at transparency, Snyder decided to release some e-mails pertaining to the communications about the crisis. I found an interesting one that was sent to a Chinese government official:

TO: Chinese Plenipotentiary For The People’s Water

FROM: Snyder, Rick

RE: Wanna buy a river? 😉

CC: McCormick, Susan

SUBJECT: As I am sure you are aware, the Flint River in the State of Michigan has now become an extreme liability. Even though I have no more use for it, I figured the people of China may be interested in purchasing it. We all know Chinese water quality doesn’t have to be as good as ours (our state is surrounded by the largest concentration of freshwater in the world, and WE STILL are having water problems, lol!), so I wanted to see if you would be interested in purchasing the Flint River. You could use it for drinking water, the production of baby formula, or you could even extract the lead and use it for nefarious purposes! Hell, I don’t give a damn what you do with it. I had such a fantastic experience selling China my old business, Gateway, that I figured we could do business again. Let me know ASAP what you would like to do, I will sell it for a very reasonable price.



Rick Snyder


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